What Do I Know?

Dear world,

                      I was just thinking to myself. Many people have asked me how I would describe myself and I never have an answer. I always end up saying, "I'm just different," which I am. I'm not a part of a clique, though I quite possibly could join several, and I prefer to be the "middle" person. I never describe myself to people because I don't feel as if I can use enough words, or the right words, to do so. It's like having writers block. Now when it comes to writing, I generally always have something to say unless I'm thinking way too many thoughts at once (which is like what I feel when asked to describe myself). When it comes to conversations however, I often don't have a lot to say. I find it easier to stay quiet unless something is worth saying. This is why I'm very laconic.                                                          What do I know?

Some things are meant to be left speechless. You can't describe to a blind person the joy and beauty of what can be seen. You can't put a price on people just as there are never enough words in the dictionary to describe a particular feeling to it's fullest, or in this case, what a person is like. These are few of the many things that came to mind when thinking about myself:

I’m the type of girl who won’t be the first to say hello. I’m the type of girl that smiles when you say her name in the sense that you actually know it. I may not carry on the conversation well but I’m the girl that’s excited just to stand in front of you. I’m the type of girl who will blush when you like what I say. I’m the girl that sits alone listening to anything at all. I’m the girl who stutters in her speech but can’t put down a pencil. I’m the type of girl to laugh at a joke that she doesn’t understand. I’m the type of girl to make her own fairytale.

I’m the girl that stops for a second to breathe in the fresh air. I’m the type of girl to notice the lonesome dandelion across the way. I’m the type of girl to run outside when she sees the ice cream truck like the child I am. I’m the type of girl to chase her own tail until she finds another to pursue. I’m the type of girl that can’t simply sit on the shore without testing the waters. I’m the type of girl to get inspired by the shell in the sand. I’m the girl that waits for the tide to roll in. I’m the type of girl to run away into the woods screaming and dancing and jumping for joy. I’m the tree that stands so tall but falls with the slightest a breeze. I’m the type of girl who will always scrape her knees. I’m the type of girl who will shut down after I stand up.

I’m the type of girl to stare out her window painting pictures in her mind. No matter how many mistakes I make I’ll walk with my head up knowing I’m going to make more. I’m the girl with her arms crossed and eyes wide open. I’m the girl that daydreams and can never focus on only one thing at once. I’m the girl that will fall up and down the stairs and everywhere in between. I’m the girl that can trace her own path back for a thousand years. I’m the girl that won’t remember what was happening right then and there but will remember the date and time and place in the past and what you said then. I’m the girl that will sing in the shower. I’m the girl that will slip on a bar of soap sitting somewhere over her head. I’m the girl that will get in over her head and like it. I’m the girl to splatter dishwater everywhere. I’m the girl to taste dishes from every country in the world. I’m the girl who will throw on the T-shirts and sneakers and put her hair in pigtails just for kicks. I’m the girl who will use a hairbrush as a microphone. I’m the girl that is too afraid to list her favorite songs to you for a fear that you may not like them too. I am a girl that stands high on the sports scoreboard but always has farther to go. I’m the girl that can’t stand anything less than symmetry and perfection. I’m the girl who will spend hours debating on whether or not her bedroom painting is centered. I’m the girl who views moments in life as a picture perfect painting. I’m the girl that can’t keep a secret because she’s too excited. I’m the girl that you won’t find in the same place ever again.

I’m the girl who thinks she’s weirder than an alien that’s out of this world. I’m the girl who rolls on the floor licking her face over the cheesiest songs. I’m the girl that people look up to but I can’t trust myself. I’m the girl who has no clue what she’s doing but knows where she is going. I’m the girl that has everything she could dream of but throws it out for her own insecurities. I’m the girl that looks confident. I’m the girl that thinks she’s confident. I’m the girl who rarely speaks but tells too much. I’m the girl who can’t tell time when she’s out of line. I’m the girl that will tell you everything then regret it. I’m the girl that’s too afraid to complain if you make her upset. I’m the girl that knocks herself silly over the silliest things. I’m the girl that wants to move on but can’t let go of the past. I’m the girl that will take in your harsh remarks with the beating of her heart.

I’m the girl that has nothing to revolve around. I’m the girl that gravity is pulling down. I’m the girl that can’t hold onto her own frown. I’m the type of girl with walls to be knocked down. I am type of girl to ignore what you say until I believe it. I am the type of girl to break things down until they are plain black and white.

I’m the type of girl to randomly get into drama. I may be the type of girl to stay away from the parties but I stay close to the door. I may be single but I’m holding my own hand. I’m the girl that will kiss you then seal her lips after the fact. I’m the type of girl to lie if you ask if I’m in love. Friends don’t choose boys over friends but I’m the type of girl to let you. I’m the type of girl that stumbles on with shaking hands. I’m the girl that tries to be the sweetest thing in the world then lets herself down. I’m the type of girl that will take things too far then fall too short. I’m the type of girl that misses you even if I say I don’t. My heart breaks for what breaks yours.

RANDOM QUOTE:
"I'm the type of girl that can be so hurt but can still look at you and smile; the type of girl who is willing to brighten your day even if I can't brighten my own."

RANDOM ICON:

What's on your mind? I feel like talking.

- Sydney